Negotiations

Letter to Louis Vuitton

This blog needs explanation.

Awhile back I had an idea for a mobile called White Elephante. The idea shall remain concealed for potential future use. All you need to know is that one day, when walking by a Louis Vuitton store, I noticed one thing…

THE WHITE ELEPHANTE IN THE WINDOW.

I must have it. So, I wrote this letter to Louis Vuittion…

“Hey Mom…do you really think I should donate these?”

In the movie Toy Story 3, the main character Andy is faced with a decision: he must take his toys to college, store them in the attic, or donate them.

Andy’s Mom doesn’t care what happens to the toys: she just knows that something needs to be done with them.

The toys don’t want to be thrown away: they want be played with.

Andy has more toys than he knows what to do with. He doesn’t want to take the toys to college. He doesn’t think he can sell them online. He doesn’t know anyone special and responsible enough to take care of them.

What to do?

Woody, the Toy Story star, comes to life and takes action. He scribbles a message on a Post-It note and slaps it on the box of toys that await their fate. Andy finds the Post-It and reads it. The movie never allows the audience to see the Post-It note from Woody, but the movie does show Andy donating his toys in the next scene to end the movie.

Ultimately, Andy’s best decision was to give his toys to someone who would get good use out of them.

I tell this story because I see you as Andy, the decision maker who needs to make a decision on what to do with the circus elephants in the window. “Mom” is Louis Vuitton. And I’m Woody, writing with a Post-It note that includes a simple request:

Like Andy was moving on to college in the movie, you’ll be moving on to a new sales season in 2012. Happy New Year! Now what are you going to do with the trunks in the display window?

Now I know that the mere thought of donating an elephant to a random requester makes you feel like ‘Rex,’ the Toy Story dinosaur when he shouts:

“I HATE ALL THIS UNCERTAINTY!”

That’s why I’m going to remove that uncertainty for you by outlining my elephant donation operation. I’m going to make this unbelievably easy for you to give me an elephant.

1) The donation will be completely confidential. You won’t see me tweeting to my Twitter following that I scored a sweet circus elephant from Louis Vuitton. You’re not going to see this elephant on eBay. To prove this point, I’ve attached a signed non-disclosure and not for resale agreement to this letter.

2) I will pay the costs to have the elephant repainted to the point where it’s not recognizable. Then, I’ll mail you a postcard of the updated elephant (like I have this letter) to make sure everything meets expectations.

3) I will pick up the elephant from the Scottsdale Fashion Square location on the date and time that the circus is scheduled to leave town.

4) Like the great Houdini, you’ll never see or hear about the elephant again.

I never mentioned why I want the elephant. If you’re curious about why I’ve put in all this effort and I’ve peaked your interest enough, call me (phone number). It will be worth the call.

Reach for the sky,
Brett Farmiloe

Postscript: Louis Vuitton responded. They said no. Not the first time I’ve been rejected, and won’t be the last. 

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